YVALIKS

When I was a teenager, I became very interested in Psychology, Therapy and Counselling. I have always recognised that humans beings are very peculiar with their mind and emotions. I have always find it interesting to see why people act the way they do, how personality are formed, why are some people more open than others, how influenced are we by our environment, but more importantly how trauma shapes us. So I read a lot of books on the subject out of interest.

I am also very introverted by nature, so I deal with my emotions by internalising them (which is not healthy). I always said that with the amount of Psychology books I had read in my life, I can analyse myself and therefore deal with any issues myself.

‘Did I mention before that I was hyper-dependent? ‘.

For years, I acted as my own therapist. I always thought that I was doing a decent job. I knew what was wrong with me (most of the time), and l somehow knew what to do to ‘fix it’. 

However, these past five years, I started to have troubles with ‘my self-therapy’ and my coping mechanisms were not as efficient as they used to be. It came to a point where I felt like nothing was working and I wasn’t getting better. Actually I was getting worse.

In January 2021, I hit a wall.

A heartbreak led me to realise that I may need to ask for extra help. So I did.

I searched and thankfully found a christian counsellor.

Since it was during the pandemic, the sessions were all online. It made it easier to have the sessions, since distance was not an issue. At first it was awkward, and I have to admit it did felt weird to tell so much to a stranger. I wasn’t thrilled about it and I even doubted her methods at times. But I was willing because I wanted to get better, so I started to open up.

She was really kind and very compassionate. I even wished that I could be friend with her at some point. Most importantly she was very helpful. Overtime, she helped me seeing things in me and my situations, that I could not see myself. She helps me identify my feelings more clearly, and introduced me to some useful behavioural techniques.

There were times when it was really hard, as I had to confront some unpleasant truths or emotions that I kept hidden for so long. ‘Doing the work’ was actually feeling emotions that I didn’t want to confront. There were many times after the sessions, where I was feeling down and uneasy. But I found out that it was all part of the recovery process. I started to feel better and slowly but surely, I was more at ease with my mind and my heart.

In the past, there was a lot of stigma about mental health. People who were seeking professional help were labelled ‘crazy’ or ‘instable’. But in reality, we all have at some point in our life, encountered traumatic and difficult situations that have bruised us deeper. Some people can also be more affected than others; but reality remains that we could all do with some assistance.

The way I see it, is that when I have a physical issue, I go straight to see a medical professional to assist.

The same goes then with any issues I have with my mind, feelings and emotions. There is nothing wrong with consulting a professional; someone qualified who has expertise.

This month is mental health awareness month and I am grateful that the coming generations understand the importance of looking after ourselves.

We are now recognising more that there are mental health conditions and emotional disorders out there that require specific attention. There are also people who may going through difficult situations and struggle to deal with them. Especially after the pandemic and with the current economic crisis, we hear more stories of people struggling with loneliness and isolation, grief, job loss and suicide ideation. It’s important to remember that there are people who can help, whether they are counsellors, therapist or psychiatrists.

You do not have to face life alone battling internal voices.

You can reach out.

Help is available…Be willing

It’s okay to seek for professional help.

I did…It helped.

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